I was looking for notebook paper to once again try and make a monthly menu so I could shop more efficiently and I thought, oh, that binder I have...the one with the white horses on it...I’ve never kept up with the journal I started in it, literally 20+ years ago...there’ll be a ton of unused notebook paper in there. It’ll be a bit old, but still usable, no need to open one of the spare packs I have for the kiddo. Well, yes, there was, is, a ton of notebook paper in it. Also, dividers (labeled “Contract,” “Routines & Lists,” “Journal,” “Menus & Shopping,” “Diet & Workout”, a contract with myself, and a zipper pouch of pens, ruler, and stickies. “facepalm” Wanna know the date? 19 JUL 09. Yes, 2009. *eyeroll and another facepalm*
I don’t know whether to be heartened by the fact that apparently nothing’s (or very little) changed in my outlook, or to be very disturbed nothing’s changed in my outlook.
*confused look*
So, here’s the contract I wrote out then (and I REALLY wish WP would preserve Word formatting):
I. Whereas –
A. I am tired of being...
- tired all the time,
- fat,
- stiff,
- in pain,
- in a disaster zone,
- financially out of control,
- family,
- my body,
- nature,
- the Divine,
- my creativity,
- years,
- talents,
- resources,
A. Intelligent,
B. Talented,
C. Resourceful,
D. Determined,
E. The only one who can change ME
III. Therefore, I resolve...
A. To Rejuvenate by...
- stretching,
- following a workout plan,
- getting the proper amount of rest,
- making healthy food choices,
- develop my household routines,
- create and follow a budget and pay-off plan
- having family meals at the table,
- include Mother in more things,
- meditate and pray
- invite the Divine in through prayer and ritual,
- set aside time for creating,
- life is short, spend every moment wisely,
- things don’t have to be perfect,
- appreciate and use what I do have and not bemoan what I don’t have,
- life is a work in progress and will never be finished.
A. To not overload by...
- trying to do it all at once,
- losing perspective,
- expecting immediate results,
- forgetting the larger picture by getting caught up in the details.
1.review the day
a. What did I accomplish?
b. What was left undone?
- move to the next day –or–
- re-evaluate – do I need to do it
–tomorrow?
–another time?
–does something else need to get done first?
- Does a schedule or routine need to be changed based on a/b?
- [Write in journal, especially things I am thankful for]
2. review and prioritize tomorrow
3. follow the routine
C. Remember I am part of the web...
1. I am central to my, if I don’t care of my needs, no one else will,
2. [but] I also touch and impact others,
3. some small thing I do –or don’t do–can resonate billions of light years away, plucking the web and thereby change the Universe,
E. don’t be your own worst enemy,
F. follow thru through [hahahahah]
G. KISS (keep it simple, silly!)
19 July 2009 then, is the first day of the rest of my life, the day I choose to be reborn. I make this covenant with myself, the Divine within and without as my witness.
I was going to rewrite or type up the contract but I want it to be as is, imperfect, fluid, dynamic, and alterable, like life itself.
Follow through!
//signed//
19 July 2009
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It would be laughable...it is laughable...but it’s exactly what I would write today. There’s some reason I found this today, some pivotal moment, I suppose. Trying not to read too terribly much into it, but I’m renewing this and am going to put effort into seeing it through.
