13 August 2014

That previous post was started before I went in hospital to have my surgery. I wasn't sure where I was going with it so I just posted it as I left it.

Even as I was being prepared for surgery I had my doubts about losing both breasts--not much I can do about it now, though--and thought, maybe I can still opt for just the lumpectomy. But I thought about it again and was content (can't say "happy") with my decision.

The surgery ended up taking nearly twice as long as predicted and I don't remember anything about them coming in the pre-op room to get me and start the IV like I have for previous surgeries and procedures.  For some odd reason that bothers me. I guess they must have given me some whopping potent shit to put me out. lol

I still have not had the courage to look in the mirror at the carnage....I've seen a bit and it's still really bruised and swollen around the left side where he took a couple of lymph nodes. I see him tomorrow and I know the drains won't come out yet (curses).

The hysterectomy part was hurting the most at first...particularly if I let all the pain meds wear off; I couldn't really stand up straight. Now it's getting better, but I'll still have to put up with damned bleeding for awhile.

Odd moment...looking down into my t-shirt yesterday and realizing I had no idea I had so many of those stupid little hemangiomas I get under my breasts...

Ch-ch-ch-changes...

I've done away with my paid domain, so if I had any regular followers *cough*, they might not be able to find me. Since I think only my best friend followed me, don't have much to worry about.

It struck me the other night that you don't have to die to become a statistic. I've become a statistic. Middle-aged, overweight, breast cancer, metabolic syndrome (aka borderline type II Diabetes); hysterectomy to finally end issues that nearly killed me before.  The Working Dead. *sighs*

This, right here. explains exactly what I'm feeling..

...and why I decided to have a bilateral, or CPM, mastectomy.

Spot. On.

23 July

Okay, so my gyno called today and wanted my cardiologist to clear me for surgery (I had a bit of an a-fib arrhythmia episode at the end of January). Long story short, his nurse called me back and set that for 4 August. Then later the urogyno office called and said since I've already met my deductible and out-of-pocket limits this year, the hysterectomy would be 100% covered. Yay!

Here's some in-depth vids of the DIEP flap reconstruction. Don't watch if you're squeemish.

Diet revamp:  it's been over two months since I had a soda (can we say jonesing?!?), given up alcohol, sugar, white carbs. coffee for the most part.

On the art side of things.

Recycling, repurposing, and up-cycling are a thing. A thing I like very much. So I bought this pencil case/easel from Jerry's

And it's really cool and holds all my pencils, but the thing is just too large for my desk in my studio.  

One of the things I love to do is make desk organizers from little boxes different products come it. Most of the time I put these in the recycle, but every now and then for some bizarre reason, I start saving the little boxes for eye drops, Band-aids, glucose test strips, toothpaste, face lotion, you name it. Then I glue the top flaps in, or cut them down to size and cut the four corners into new flaps and glue those in; glue the bottoms closed, if necessary, and cover them in either decorative paper, or in this case, maps from an old road atlas.

Then I play around until I get the configuration I want and cut a piece of cardboard for the bottom, cover it, and start gluing the boxes on and together. This is what I made for my colored pencils last week.

Front

Left Side

Top

Back

I decorated it with washi tape and then put a coat of gloss Mod Podge on top. Voila!  The little bottle that looks like a baking ingredient really is. It's ancient pure lemon extract that went completely alcohol on me, so I use it to blend the pencils. The pencils are sorted by color groups that make sense to me, plus blenders. The pencils that have gotten way short are in the front where I can find them. It's compact and portable. If I decide to take my pencils somewhere, I'll just use a zip bag...not like I don't have a million of 'em.

I might actually miss this

The cleavage that shows up when I wear a sports bra... heh.